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I also got a rather embarassing one when if I needed to go to the toilet I would get the feeling I had or would wet myself :blushing: I would tense up and move about to prevent it happening.
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For a while I used to be petrified I would shout something out in a public place like the cinema and would near enough hold my mouth shut to stop me. Good to find this forum eh? Its a real helpful and very supportive place for people like you and me. I'll end off with: Who else identifies with my worst problem? I wash my hands a lot when preparing food for others but this is not a cleaning ritual - I'm just terrified I'll confess to them later that I made it after picking my nose or something! I'm much better now, but still worry I may dream something or think something and get the urge to tell someone about it who would not approve (only people who matter to me, like my parents). These symptoms spread terribly, to everything. In addition to the physiological response of nausea, I also fear getting the physiological sensation of sexual arousal when it doesn't seem appropriate or isn't wanted (isn't it strange - we don't worry so much about crying when we're happy, or laughing when we're nervous, although these, too are physiological responses). I worried about needing to go to the loo when I couldn't escape to do so, or of vomiting at inappropriate times (at the dinner table at the dentist - I once got so worked up I spewed on the table in MacDonald's), and I also worried about getting inappropriate thoughts, especially of a sexual nature. Up until I was about 19, my symptoms were mostly noticeable as rituals like touching, checking and counting to ward off horrible things happening - I didn't have much insight for a long time, and found it hard to resist these rituals.īut then I got the urge to tell people who mattered about things I'd done of which they wouldn't approve, and the effort to keep it in made me physically sick. I have suffered from OCD (and a bit of Tourette's) now for 30 years, but got an increased insight into the problem only a couple of years ago (there is always something new to learn). I am new here and just wanted to introduce my particular problems, with an emphasis on the so called 'Imp of the Perverse' - when you get the urge to do or say the complete opposite to what is appropriate!!
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